Writing copy for a better Customer Experience – the Pause

Imagine you’re being tasked with writing copy for a better customer experience.

Perhaps the churn rate’s gone up recently.

It’s easy to jump in and start tweaking a few things.

Or maybe you think it’s time you got some copywriter training – because, like, you thought you were good enough. But maybe the churn is down to you and your copywriting.


But before you dive in and start writing copy for a better customer experience, what about creating a better customer experience?

Rather than trying to conjure it out of the copywriting?
If churn’s the problem, remember: Life’s not binary.
Between ‘Customer’ and ‘Ex-customer’ there’s another customer experience status. 
And it’s a profitable option, if you can phrase it right.
Here’s how Audible have done it:

What an you learn from Audible’s writing for a better customer experience here?

1. Don’t start with empathy
Obviously it’s an empathetic headline.
But only the second part of it.
It doesn’t let the need to signal empathy sweep away the readers’ original need.
Acknowledge the need (taking a break).
Only then build the empathy (until things settle down).

2. Mention the reason they were a client in the first place.
“…to try to keep you informed, inspired and amused”
Nice reminder of all that Audible can do.

3. Don’t just load the spoon, put it in their mouth
Probably the trickiest part of all digital writing is the CTA.
How do you make it clear without patronising?
I think this does it right:
It’s clear on what’s possible (put membership on pause).
Clear on what WiiFM (makes it easier to pick up just where we left off).
(WiiFM = what’s in it for me)

4. Doesn’t let the ‘creative’ urge overcome the writing.
Did you spot the metaphor at work here?
It’s about relationships.
Which, if they’re good relationships, are of mutual benefit.
But it doesn’t take the old adland approach.
No headline about ‘We’re on a break’.
The metaphor isn’t gilded.
The metaphor serves.
Not leads.

Want to stop some of your clients becoming ex-clients

We’re language animals. Language is how we share ideas and build relationships. Right now, clear communication and good writing are not optional.
1. You can always buy me a coffee If you’d like me to look at something you’ve written to retain your customers, I’d like that.
2. I know it’s tough. If I can’t afford to work for you, I’ll find someone good that can. Email me and I’ll give you some names.
3. Right now, we all need to be agile. The fastest, smartest and cheapest way to rearrange how your customers think about you is with good language. You can change what they think in 24 hours.
You can read a best-sellling book* about this stuff. It has over 50 *****  reviews.
And you can ask its charming, brilliant, modest author some questions – with no obligation to do anything after. Just book a 30 minute chat. No obligation.

About the book. It went to #1. It’s been reviewed by 20 leading CMOs. It’s had some very nice things said about it. Most of all, it’s insanely useful when you want to make your company’s fastest, smartest, cheapest and most underused asset work for you.
* It’s an affiliate link. That means, if you buy the book, you don’t pay a penny more, but Jeff B showers riches (actually about 2p) on me.And here’s the link again to save you the trouble of scrolling back to the top.

About Verbal Identity

We are writers, strategists and linguistics experts: super-specialists in the magic and mechanics of language. We know how language creates thinking. And how – if you shape the language of your company, your comms and your customers – you shape what people think and do, read more…

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